i don’t get my darn parents. i’m going camping for the weekend with my friends and their boyfriends in jim thorpe. the trip sounds loads of fun and i can’t wait, but i just knew my parents would not be ok with my boyfriend and i going together and sleeping in the same tent. this is why i decided to not tell them because i knew they wouldn’t let me go and have a good time with my friends. i knew they would eventually find out or ask who was going, but they didn’t until tonight. my dad asked if my boyfriend was going, and lying would have made things worse, so i said yes. i waited for him to freak, but he didn’t. i knew he was mad, but he didn’t seem that mad. i went downstairs, and thought maybe just maybe they finally have realized i’m an adult, they can trust me and i have been going out with my boyfriend for 10 months now. obviously they didn’t. i got called upstairs and both of my parents freaked and were mad cause they didn’t know before. i told them i knew they would freak and they were like yea cause it’s the wrong thing to do. it just went in a huge circle for a good thirty minutes. my parents are beyond old fashioned, which is hard to grow up with in this generation. they were like we shouldn’t let you go and blahblahblah. even my friend’s boyfriend’s parents were fine with it and they’re just like my parents. my parents even dared to say everybody else’s parents have no standards. no mom and dad they know they did the same things as kids. i know my parents went out all the time too. 

stuff like this also makes me think about how different my life would have been if my sister wasn’t autistic. i know i talk about it a lot, but it’s almost a maddening thought. i feel like my parents would be less strict with me and maybe just maybe i wouldn’t have been alone in my argument. maybe she would have been a more rebellious daughter and they would cool it with me. maybe i wouldn’t have to try so hard to be the perfect daughter. maybe just maybe my life would have been easier with somebody by my side to relate to.

joydivsion:

i know sometimes life is hard and all but you should never consider suicide as an option because oh i don’t know you only live once omg yolo but yea you don’t get second chances when it comes to your life so just don’t do it focus on good things like your friends and family and if you don’t have a good family or good friends try to stay positive ok just don’t kill yourself